Hey, this is a little bit of a different episode and it stemmed from a question that I get asked all the freaking time, all the time. And to be honest, it’s usually really hard for me to answer this question. So I set out to actually do a little bit of data collection on myself so that I can more properly answer said question.

And this question is, As someone who is a, I guess, previous mindset researcher, can I still call myself, not, probably, yeah, not, not current mindset researcher, someone who has done a lot of work in the mindset research field, who has published research on mindset, who has spent so much time in the realm of behavior change and psychology, how do you manage your own mindset?

This is something I am asked all of the time. It’s such a difficult question to answer because so much of what I do for my own mindset, my own mindset work, is pretty, like, natural at this point. It’s something that just comes quite easy for me. So, when I’m asked this, I’m like, oh man, I don’t know. I definitely, like, ask myself questions and I, like, work through things.

But what does that actually end up, like, manifesting as? On a day to day basis, what am I, Dr. Casey Jo, doing to work on my own mindset, to manage my own self sabotaging tendencies, and that Is what this episode is all about and I’m really excited to share it with you because I spent probably a week, week and a half with this top of mind so that anytime I was thinking a certain way or struggling with something that as I, after I worked through it, I was like, Oh, I have to go write this down so I can include it in the podcast.

So. What I have here for you is just like a whole slew of things. There’s no like particular organization of things that I do and things that I don’t do based on what I know about mindset, psychology, and behavior change. And a lot of this, obviously, is the same stuff. That I teach to you all of the time.

It’s stuff that’s included in the health mindset coaching certification. It’s stuff that I’ve used with clients for the decade that I’ve been in the coaching industry. So. I very much try to not just talk the talk, but walk the walk as well. So, I, as I said, have been keeping like a running note in my phone, so literally like if I was standing in line at the grocery store and like working through something in my head or having a conversation with a friend, I’d go like, oh my gosh, I need to go put that down in my notes.

So, again, no general organization here. Because this is literally just like sort of like stream of consciousness over the last few, couple weeks, um, or so. And there’s definitely, definitely, please know, this list is not exhaustive by any means. There’s a lot of other things that I’m doing all of the time and a lot of things that I probably I can’t even catch myself because it does just come so second nature to me at this point.

And I want you to also realize that that can be the reality for you, too. That just because I have a PhD in psychology and I researched growth versus fixed mindset and behavior change doesn’t make me special. It just means that this stuff has been put in front of me a lot more and I know it really well and that there’s no reason you can’t know this stuff better, that you can’t immerse yourself in these things more and make it second nature for yourself as well.

Okay. Alright, so the first thing I have written down was a quote. It’s a quote that I It’s a phrase that I said to myself and that phrase was if I could do it, then there’s no reason I can’t do it now. So this is essentially reminding myself that I’ve already proven to myself before that I could do something.

And to be honest, I probably should have left more context with these notes because I’m not sure what. This was in reference to, um, but I, the moral of this little story here is that I still need to remind myself all of the time that I am capable of doing things that I’m not just, you know, going out into the world feeling 1000 percent confident in everything that I do every podcast that I record every time I get on a live call with my students, what have you like there’s Still questioning self doubt, things like that, present in my life, and I do have to manage those things.

So, I think this might have been in reference to the most recent HMCC launch, because going into every single launch, I still have anxiousness, I still have nerves of, you know, what if this doesn’t go the way that I want it to, or doesn’t go as planned, and I have gotten so much better at detaching from the outcome, which, I guess that would be like, Point A underneath this first bullet point here, um, like detachment in general and just like working on that skill overall is, is something that I’ve put a lot of time and effort into and is definitely, I’ve definitely seen a return on investment in that regard, but anyway, so recognizing if I was successful before, Why would I be questioning my success now?

You know, I’ve already proved to myself that I can get 60 to 100 plus coaches into an HMCC cohort. Why would I assume that like, oh, now’s the time I’m going to get 10, 0 even, you know? And as humans, we tend to catastrophize and go that direction and spiral. But the mindset work here, right, is to catch yourself before you really start spiraling.

Catch yourself at the top of the spiral before you make your way down. And that’s kind of what I’m doing here. Like, I would notice maybe myself going in that direction and be like, uh uh. No, no, no, no. Like, what evidence do you actually have that you won’t be successful now if you’ve already been successful in the past?

So that is something that I’m doing. Often. Next thing, I make actual, intentional, concrete decisions, and whenever I feel like I’m not doing what I want to be doing, or if I have had, you know, little mini discussions with myself, as we do, and I’m thinking like, why didn’t I get that done? Or why didn’t I do that thing?

Or why am I not being consistent with this? Or why did I not stop doing that thing that I wanted to stop doing? Whenever that comes up. I am aware of the fact that I have yet to actually make a concrete decision on that thing. It’s not enough to just think to yourself, like, Oh, I want to stop doing this.

I want to get better at that. Like, I want to be more consistent with this. Like, that’s not enough. You need to be concrete and have, like, some specific, like, deadline in your head or a decision of, like, how things are going to go. So It’s so much for me and, you know, for people in general, a matter of just making a fucking decision and then sticking with that decision.

Obviously, the sticking with the decision part requires work as well, that process. But so often, we’re just missing that concrete decision. So that is something that I do with myself when I notice like, why am I not sticking with this thing, being consistent with that, stopping this other thing? And I’m like, duh.

Because I haven’t made a concrete decision. So in certain things in my life, if I want to stop doing things, start doing something, I usually give myself a deadline. You know, there was. A few times in like the last year where I was like trying to pick up a habit or stop, uh, another habit and I would give myself a deadline of like, I’m not going to do this thing for X amount of days until this specific date, or I’m going to stick with this thing for the next two weeks and then see how I feel and reassess.

I give myself that timeline and I make a concrete decision versus like, I kind of want to stop doing this. I kind of want to start doing that. That’s, it’s not enough. And you’re just going to frustrate yourself. And so that’s something that I do a lot is like, I recognize when I am like floundering in these things.

And I’m like, because I don’t have a concrete decision made, I haven’t been intentional with it yet. Um, next thing. I redirect my thoughts like it is my frickin full time job. I do this so much. This is probably, like, the thing that I’m doing so consistently, which, like, makes sense, right? Um, but it’s, again, easier said than done and, like, you know, like, duh, just, like, change your thoughts and, like, then you’ll change your life type of thing.

Um, but it, it does take practice and effort to actually do that redirecting. Because first and foremost, you need to become aware. of the thoughts that you’re currently having in order to redirect them somewhere else, in order to set up, you know, route B instead of route A. So, it requires mindfulness and self awareness to recognize those thoughts and then, like, actually Take a, take a pause, take a beat, and redirect somewhere else.

Um, an example I did write down here was our Fall 2024 launch for HMCC was our biggest revenue launch yet. Woo! Insert confetti! Um, which is so exciting. But I caught myself not wanting to celebrate for these, like, ridiculous reasons. Are you ready? Reason number one, biggest revenue, sure, but like, not by a ton.

Not by a ton. Like, we’re talking, fam. I think somewhere around like 5, 000 to 10, 000 was the difference from like our last best launch, which was a year and a half prior to that. So then I start kicking myself and going, well, at this point, we should be seeing much larger launches, much better launches. And the fact that it took me this long to even like barely surpass the last one, like, come on.

Ridiculous, right? So. That said, I was very good about, I know I’m like, reenacting these thoughts now, but I don’t truly believe them anymore. And I’m not even sure I really believe them in the first place. It was more so that these thoughts would come up and then I would go, What, what the hell is this?

Like, we’re not doing this here. Like, not, not today. Not today. Um, and instead I went into look to, well, what made this launch? The, the best one yet in that regard, right? And something I really leaned into and was like, so aware of the entirety of the launch was how different my energy felt. And again, this is kind of coming back to that detachment piece that I was talking about previously.

I, I even sent my, uh, business mentor like a multiple minute voice memo on this like mid HMCC launch and thanking him because he helped me get to be in this space. space, this space of detachment. A lot of that was like due to his mentorship. Um, and I was recognizing that in the mid launch, you know, I was kind of like running the numbers thinking about based on statistics of past launches and stuff like this is probably not going to be like a blow things out of the water type of launch, um, but I honestly, I didn’t care because I was just, I literally was brought to tears mid launch because I felt so aligned in the work that I’m doing and so uh, incredibly grateful, like the word grateful literally doesn’t even cut it, that this is the work that I get to do.

And this is my job? Like, what? Just crazy. Just crazy. And the impact that I know Is being made in so many people’s lives and I think a lot of the stuff we did in the last launch as well. Like we did some like open house type of stuff and brought in alumni members and like hearing their experiences. Like it’s one thing to know that I’m like behavior change, mindset, psychology, and understanding all this stuff from an evidence based perspective and putting it into your coaching practices.

I know that’s going to make a huge fucking difference. It is another thing to hear. Variations of that come from the mouths of our students, and I got to do a lot of that in that last launch, so I think that also helped, like, ground me in, in my purpose, truly. So So instead of like sitting in this place of like, it could have been better, which it, it, it could always be better.

Right. And like, that’s what we’re working towards. And now I’m super stoked to take what we learned from this launch and apply it to the next one and keep doing this for as long as I am capable. This happens a lot, like I said, I’ll have some thoughts crop up and I’ll catch them really quickly and redirect them somewhere else and a lot of times the redirection is into a place of gratitude, it’s recognizing things for the way that they are, for the facts that are in front of me, and coming to a more accurate depiction of what’s actually going on.

Next thing I have. I ask myself, I’m literally like, guys, rereading this note, kind of for the first time, so I’m like trying to remember everything that I wrote down here. Um, ask myself when my reaction feels bigger than it should for a given situation. Okay, okay. So in this one, and this is actually a good plug for a previous episode that I did about when to recognize when something is maybe related to a past experience or like a little t trauma type of experience versus like a gut instinct, you know, when something is feeling like it’s telling you like not to do it.

Like, is that a gut instinct? Like I shouldn’t do it? Or is it like a protective mechanism because you’re trying to stay safe and comfortable so you shouldn’t do it for those reasons, but. Which means you actually should, right? So, when I have a reaction to something that feels a little bit more emotional, just more, like, more powerful in, in not a great way, then it should, given the situation.

Like, if someone was outside looking in and they saw what I was reacting to and how I was reacting to it in the the experience that I was having they would be like, what’s the big deal? Like, why are, why does that bother you so much? So I do that. I zoom out and I think like if someone else was looking in, would they think that my reaction and how I am feeling because of this situation is warranted?

And I ask myself, too, in these situations, like, where did that come from? Like, if I am noticing a, like, a visceral reaction to maybe a message from someone, um, an email, or just, like, how something ended up playing out, and it’s, like, it feels like it’s a larger response than maybe is warranted, then I immediately, like, shut it down.

What am I making this mean? Because I am creating some sort of meaning, most likely, that is not necessarily in line with what the actual situation presented. So, I do do that quite frequently as well. Um, with any negative thoughts, this is the next one. I really, really, really, Try to not let myself spiral.

So we’re talking again about like catching yourself before you make your way down the spiral, like catching yourself at the top as, as close to the top as you can. And I catch myself in the act and, and really ask myself, like, where did that come from? There’s literally been instances where I’ve been driving or getting ready, like looking at myself in the mirror, and the mirror’s great because then I talk to myself in the mirror.

I do do that. Also, I am that person. I am that crazy person. Um, that if I have like a negative thought that comes up, like, you know, an example of a thought could be just like, Oh, that’s because you’re not good enough, or you won’t ever be good enough, or you’re not going to ever be that successful, or that won’t ever be possible for you, whatever, you know, name your favorite negative thought.

When that comes up, The immediate thing I think next is not, oh yeah, that’s true, or like, here’s all the evidence to support that, and start to feel bad for myself, and then carry that with me into the day. No, it’s an immediate stop. And question, where did that come from? And I’ve literally said this out loud to myself.

Again, like, I have an experience that’s coming up for me, um, when I was getting ready, standing in front of the mirror, and thinking something. And I looked at myself in the mirror and I said, where did that come from? Because it’s just like, what? Like, we do this too. Like, these, just like, these intrusive thoughts come out of, like, fucking thin air.

So. I asked myself where did that come from because there’s usually a reason that it’s coming up, you know, an experience that maybe happened a few days ago or is related to like an email that I read that morning or whatever, whatever it may be. Um, I asked myself where it came from so I can better understand why I’m having that thought because I know ultimately.

The thought’s not true, but there is some truth to it because otherwise I wouldn’t be thinking it. So that’s a matter of, like, let’s figure out, like, where that piece of evidence is making this come into the picture, come into my mind, and dive into that instead of, like, just diving into believing it, right?

Your thoughts are just thoughts. So let’s figure out where they came from. You don’t need to let them consume you, become you. They can literally just be thoughts. Another thing I do all the time is play out the script all of the way in every direction. So what I mean by this is if I’m trying to make a decision, whether it’s something as big as like, when should I publish this new offer inside of my business and launch that versus like, should I send this text message?

It could be any decision, right? I play it out in every direction, so I’m like, if I, if I do it this way, if I, if I send the message, don’t send the message, what would happen, how am I going to feel in either regard, if I send the message and they respond this way, how is that going to make me feel, if they respond that way, how is that going to make me feel, just like literally run the gamut of all the different options, all the different paths, all the different ways that this could shake out, and really check in with myself, like, how does that make me feel?

Is that in alignment with like the outcome that I’m looking for? And then based on that I’ll actually make the decision of which direction to go. Okay, so those are all things that I do do, do do, things that I don’t do. I don’t do things that I know will hurt my own feelings. Of course, I like, I don’t want you guys to think that I’m running through all of this and you’re like, Damn, like Casey’s perfect when it comes to her mindset, because that’s not the case.

And like, things will happen where I’m just like, Why did I do that? Thinking of a situation right now. Um. And I do go back and I’m like, I did something I shouldn’t have done, I knew I shouldn’t have, but I did it anyway, type of thing. Like, that does still happen, but it’s rare. It’s really rare. Um, and I’m really proud to say that it’s rare.

When I know that something is going to hurt my own feelings, it’s going to bother me, it’s going to, again, this is kind of like the playing out the script thing, right? If I play out the script in a direction and I go, that probably won’t make me feel very good, I likely won’t do it. On the off chance that I do, then there’s more mindset work that has to come after that, right?

But, um, something that comes up, I’m totally just like outing my, my group chat here. I have a, I have a group chat with some of my girlfriends and we’re all single in this group chat. I’ve mentioned the singles girls group chat before on the podcast. And there’s like always like Things going on, right?

Like, oh, this guy I’ve been dating for a little bit or that guy or whatever. People got story, we got stories on stories in this group chat, right? And Something that happens a lot, especially with like social media, is like looking up ex girlfriends or ex flings of the guy that you’re seeing now or, um, let’s say you’re in a relationship with someone, you guys break up, they start dating someone else, are you looking up that someone else and learning all about him, her, whatever?

That type of stuff. And we talk about these things in the group chat a lot, and it’s like, oh, I found her, and da da da da da, and here’s this, what’s going on here, and like, here’s what I think, and I’m just like, no, let’s not even do that, like, let’s not even entertain that. I can tell you right now, my last couple ex boyfriends, I couldn’t tell you.

What their new girlfriends look like, what they do, hardly even know their names. I wouldn’t know their names unless they were like literally told to me without, without my permission. I don’t want this information. I don’t care and I don’t, I don’t think it would add anything to my life. So I don’t go seeking out that information.

I literally, I just know. It’s not going to be helpful to me, it’s not going to make me feel good, so I won’t do it. And there’s so many instances of this in my life, of like, just don’t engage, don’t send any energy that direction, don’t spend any time that time, like your time is, your time and energy is so much better spent somewhere else.

And I’m really good, and I’m very proud of this. I’m very good at recognizing when I’m in a situation of like, Oh, is that something I want to do? Nope, it’s not. And then just carry on with my day. It’s not. It’s, again, super, super, super rare that I would entertain something that would not make me feel good when I know that it won’t.

Like, I’m not out here hurting my own feelings. Next thing, I don’t engage in negativity. Unless absolutely necessary. So even if it comes to like, the weather, it’s like, granted, when this podcast is being released, it’s not really hot in Austin, Texas, but as of today, it is. It’s still pretty hot in Austin, Texas.

And it can be really easy to just like, when you’re chatting with friends and stuff, you’re like, God, it’s so fucking hot out here, the humidity, blah, blah, blah. Um, and I will catch myself, like, Wanting to like engage in that conversation and I’m like, no, I’m not going to do that. Like it’s, I actually love where I live.

I really, really do. The heat is not that bad. I know it sounds crazy, but you do get used to it. You do get used to a hundred degrees. Um, and like, it’s just, it’s not worth. negativity, negative energy, spending time there. Like if I have like a negative work situation or something, like there are many times my friends that I am starting to type something out negative, like a text message to a friend or whatever, and I just delete it.

I’m like, I’m not doing that. I’m not going to engage in that. There’s, that is not. Something that is going to be helpful to me, you know, you know, there are times where like ranting and just like getting feelings off your chest are are therapeutic and helpful. I will say, um, it’s like a release in that way, right?

But a lot of the times it’s just like, why even? Why even there’s so much good, there’s so much to be grateful for, and it’s just, it’s not where I, it’s not the person I wanna be. I don’t wanna be a negative person. I don’t want to, I don’t want my brain to be going down those negative pathways. So I shut it down, shut it down.

I also don’t shy away from trial and error. I actually really enjoy challenge and trial trialing and erroring and trying to figure out what works and what doesn’t and learning from those things. And that is like very classic fix fix mindset, jeez, very classic growth mindset type of way of going about things, like leaning into challenge and leaning into like, I’m just I just haven’t figured it out yet.

Yet. I do a lot of that, especially when it comes to business, and honestly, some of that is my, some of my most favorite parts of being a business owner is the trial and error, is like, what can we try next? What could we do differently? And like, debriefing on things that maybe didn’t go as planned and using that information to be better next time.

I also don’t just do things I’ve always done because it’s comfortable. I have so, so, learned in my time on this planet, especially in like the last five years or so, that discomfort is often More often than not, opportunity. And when things feel like they’re going awry or not going the way that I wanted them to, or feel extra challenging or hard or sticky or difficult or heartbreaking or just awful, that there’s something really good on the other side of that.

And I’ve proven that to myself so many times to the point now when Things don’t go as planned. Things go badly. I’m in a really crappy situation. I almost have, like, this, like, A little spark of excitement that’s like, oh, what is this going to give me? What am I going to learn from this? What is this going to teach me?

And I don’t ever shy away from just doing the things that the way, doing things the way that they’ve always been done just for the sake of comfort. Because I learned that there’s so much good that comes from discomfort, and I’ve learned to almost like desire difficulty. Because of that. That is all I have in my Apple Note list.

Maybe I’ll, if you guys liked this episode, let me know, because maybe I’ll continue to take notes on myself and pay attention to things to share it with you. I know it can be helpful to hear, like, more personal type of scenarios and just, like, fun in general. You guys always, always, always comment on Like the, the personal side of the podcast when I do share things.

So if there’s anything else that you think would be helpful for me to share that is maybe a little bit more personal or just like how I operate, I would love to share. But I don’t necessarily know what it is that you want. So you gotta tell me. Um, yeah. I think that is all I have for you today. Thank you so much for your time, for being here.

I appreciate you so much and I’ll see you next time.